May 10, 2013 - Email between Barbara Ann and Elida Eickes

From: "Elida Ickes" <grandmaleda@gmail.com>

To: burnsdebburns@comcast.net

Sent: Friday, May 10, 2013 3:26:46 PM

Subject: Message to Barbara Ann

Dearest Barbara Ann,

I have tried to call you several times but I just end up crying!  I cannot believe what you are going through!  I just lost my sister in April to cancer and shortly after that I heard rumors about your cancer!  I am so sorry!  I also feel so helpless because I am so far away!  If there is anything I can do for you, please let me know.

You have done so much for me!!!  You invited me into your band, the California Natives.  That was such a compliment!! and such fond memories!!  Also, I loved walking around bluegrass festivals and campouts with you and going into jams with your accordion. The look on peoples faces was priceless but once they heard you play, you were invited into their jams any time!!  

I also remember your sweet home in PA.  I love that place!  It was perfect for you!!  I thank you for being my friend....Damn!!  There I go crying again!  We had some good times together and hopefully, we will have some more good times.  Miracles happen and that is what I am going to pray for you!!  I know you and your positive attitude and miracles can happen.  I love you and hope to hear back from you.

I have a gig tomorrow night and I will dedicate to you.  Take care, friend!!

Love,

Elida
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From: "b.a. barnett" <babaccordn@earthlink.net>
To:  "Elida Ickes" <grandmaleda@gmail.com>

Sent: Friday, May 10, 2013, at 10:58 PM,

Subject: Re: Message to Barbara Ann Oh, dear Elida,

So sorry you had to hear how you did; wish I could have told you in person, or at least on the tele.

I think the e-mail about it was intentionally sent to you, Elida, because for a couple of weeks before you got it, I had been putting out e-mails saying “Looking for Elida Eickes.”  I think your e-mail address change must have confused some folks, and I sure didn’t recognize it.  So very grateful you got the word and we can ‘talk.’  The burnsdebburns is my daughter-in-law.  Anyone who would like to visit me in the Santa Cruz region can set up a date/time with DEBRA at burnsdebburns@comcast.net

My heart goes out to you for losing YOUR sister in April, just last month?  Big, BIG Ouch.  Of course I want to know how you and Tom are, but mostly I just need to talk to you.  My snail-mail address book was obliterated last month, so I could use your phone # and snail mail address (now I’ve got the e-mail).  And are you still in Twain Harte?

I have to tell you this about our past experiences together..........with lots of the music scene, I felt like I was skating over the surface, not really taking advantage of the opportunities to get to know folks, to just hang out and enjoy, but that was not my experience with you and your family and those we made music with.  And I’m so glad for it.

Elida, it IS a special friendship we have had with very good compatibility in the midst of lots of activity.  Do you know how happy I was to make the rounds with you at the festival/campout scene....circling with that energy that you and Tom as a couple both brought in and put out—you were the mom and pop....and being able to play with Rob and with Patrick....and those sessions around the kitchen table with Robbie MacDonald singing—what a voice!  Oh, and doing whatever that dance was we did with Edith in your living room, the Cloverdale scene....all the music, all the jams and festivals and concerts.  It fulfilled something in me that nothing else did, and I believe it was due to the feeling in your family, like nothing I had experienced before.  The music was important—yes, but it was that family feeling that brought me fully in.  Thanks to you and Tom.

Bless your heart for asking if there is anything you can do for me.  YES, there is.  Find that old picture of the California Natives and get my friends (contact Dorothy Bender dbender@gmail.com) to fold it into the blog they have created in case folks want to follow the progression of whatever this is I’ve entered into.  Locate Lance Gordon—he had a firm handle on what the California Natives were about, and actually wrote up a piece about it.  I have heard recently from John Lytle, who may be able to find Lance, who I believe is in the Albuquerque area.

And the other thing you can do is stay close.  I need the people who care about me to stay as close as they can through whatever is to come; the blog will be a big help.

NOW, I have to tell you some important things.  I am not suffering a single bit!  And it’s important to get that word out.  Yes, I lapsed into a coma for several days; yes I had a couple of tumors removed; yes it’s possible my life-span has been shortened—but who really knows??  What matters is that I’m here today; I’ve had a wonderfully satisfying life in lots of ways, feeling like the luckiest woman in the world to have this time to live in the moment, enjoying having some of the west coast’s best musicians dropping in for some tunes and laughs and memories (Jim and Louise Mintun will fetch me for dinner next week—we’ll re-live memories of playing at their wedding 17 years ago!).  It is magical to be able to know you’ll die and still live life to the hilt, and it has transformed me.  The experience has been amazing, and I’m happy talk about it.  Or not!

It’s unbelievable to me that you have the fortitude to dedicate a gig tomorrow night—you go girl!  And whatever music you make, play and sing your best and it will be good.

I love you, Elida.  Call me.  (650) 815-9252 (cell).

Barbara Ann